Daycare Drama

I’m afraid of the boys in my daughter’s daycare.

It was late – almost their closing time - and I raced in to get Madden. At the end of the day all the remaining kids are together and usually outside enjoying the good weather. When I arrived, she was across the yard in the caregivers arms. She saw me, I saw her, and I loudly said, “HI BABY!” and she squealed in delight. So satisfying.

Then, the boys were there. Suddenly three older kids were upon me…teasing, jeering and yelling “Baby, Baaabbbyyyy, hiiiii baby.” They were crazed…circling me, taunting me with my own happiness. One even began leaping up at me and trying to grab my face. It was utter madness. Strangely, I was embarrassed and a bit frightened at the same time. How could I be afraid? After all, aren’t these kids like, at the most, FOUR years old??? I am actually 37 years OLDER than these little punks. So, why didn’t I feel like an adult?

Perhaps there is something about kids teasing that takes a person back in time suddenly and without warning. There I was back in carpool. Seven kids packed into the back of some parent’s gigantic wood paneled station wagon. Parry Dilworth was teasing me and pulling at the pony tails in my hair.

OK, it wasn’t that bad, but still…what a strange feeling.

I scooped up Madden and bolted through the doors of daycare. All the while I was whispering in her ear, “I’ll save you baby, you’re safe now,” when deep down I knew that it was her who was saving me.

That night led to a lot of thinking about daycare. It was not easy to find a place for her and we were on waiting lists since last July. This was back when Eric was working and we thought we’d end up needing full time care. It turns out she is just there two days per week so that she can learn to ‘play’ with other kids and have a bit of social time.

When we first went to visit this particular place, there were signs on the door that read, “We have had several incidents of lice in the past week – please check your children.”

Eee gads to that. We thought we’d never be back.

Wouldn’t you know they were the only place to call and offer us placement.

It turns out this center is the smallest of the ones at which we applied. We like the fact that there are only 30 kids total and we like that there are only 5 kids in the “under 2” room. Madden is the youngest kid by a long shot and she is often getting held and cuddled when I go to pick her up. She seems to be settling in well and doesn’t look too tired, or hungry, or upset when she comes home.

There is a chart on the wall that the daycare teacher fills in with details like the number of wet nappies, times that baby slept, and how many milliliters she drank from her bottles. Now that she’s eating solids her teacher fills in what she ate for “afternoon tea”. I rather like that. It’s so Australian.

They also keep a large scrap book in the room where they write the days activities and often include a happy photo of each child. Madden’s picture on Monday showed her in a bin of plastic balls. Next to the photo was a description that told me of my daughter’s development and excellent use of gross motor skills.
On close inspection of the photo, it was apparent that my little girl had red rings around her eyes. Hmmm.

So now I’m onto them and their game. When I drop off Madden, there is always a kid crying and another that is about to do something that will surely be reprimanded.
The REAL book would probably read something like this…

After two hours of inconsolable crying, your child was placed in the bucket of plastic balls where she finally found a brief moment of happiness. (We took a photo of happy Madden for the book). In the meantime, Ned was playing on the ground until Jake hit him over the head with the wooden block letter B. We were unable to tend to Ned due to Ari having his diaper changed at that exact moment. He cried for a time until we managed to give him a pacifier and this calmed him (see happy photo of Ned in book). Then Ari and Jake got in a fight over the letter B. At this time, Mia woke from her nap and fussed for a bottle. The two boys continued fighting until Mia’s bottle was found and mixed. Madden was now becoming unhappy after being stuck in the plastic ball box for over 20 minutes. Mia, Madden, Jake and Ned all started to cry in unison. Ari started to open the locked cabinet and was very pleased with himself. (See contented photo of Ari). Cabinet was locked and mental note was made to ensure that cabinet’s dangerous contents were not loose in baby room. Jake, now victorious since overpowering the others and getting the letter B all to himself, holds it proudly over his head (see photo in book)…..etc….etc.


****************

I came home tonight, opened up my email, and found a note from Madden’s daycare…”Please be warned that there has been one child diagnosed with worms as well as another child diagnosed with a case of conjunctivitis. Please check your child for the following signs and symptoms…..”

It Seemed like a Good Idea at the Time.

We met some other Americans when we first moved to Australia and we have become close. There seem to be a lot of similarities as couples, other than they are about ten years younger than we are. Unfortunately for us Adam and Jenn are leaving and heading back to the States in April.

As one of the many last hurrahs, we decided to meet up with them and another couple (our friends Tim and Tash and daughter Celeste) in the Barossa region of South Australia. For you wine geeks out there, Barossa is known for Shiraz.

Since Beth is returning to work after the glorious invention of maternity leave, we had options of transport. 1) Fly: The benefit of flying is of course time but is more costly. 2) Train: there was a special running for $198 all of us could ride, including taking a car. The problem is that our car was too tall for the train. Imagine that. 3) Drive: I am always up for a good road trip, the cost is reasonable, and it allows us the flexibility of time and what we can see along the way. Drive wins!

Everything begins fine, we get a late start in the morning because Madden needs feeding, then a change, and we have to try to time starting the journey with one of her long nap times. I then delayed it even further because I wanted a coffee from the local shop. I am trying to remember if Beth has blogged about the traffic here. If she hasn't, lets just say that it is awful and we get about 30 miles away within the first 2 hours when Madden has to stop to feed again. That's fine, I completely expected that we would be stopping frequently. I just thought that we would be past the outskirts of town.

Bill Bryson wrote a book about Australia, I have not read it yet but I understand that it is pretty good and the title is very appropriate….In a Sunburned Country. As most of you know we have had devastating fires here and driving through the countryside you can start to understand why. As we get past the outer ring of Melbourne the landscape looks like a tan sea. You can start to see it in the dry lawn at the end of a Minnesota summer, but it goes on as far as one can see and there has been very little watering for the last decade. Unfortunately this is where Madden started to projectile vomit. Egads

In short order we had to stop to mop everything up. Of course it can't be contained to just her. We have to take the car seat out and clean it and the back seat. This went on for what seemed like hours. I think that we were about 60 miles away from Melbourne now...just barely into a 10 hour trip. In the outback you have to take certain precautions that we are now quickly learning. Finding a tree that can provide shade is a good example, or when you make piles on the ground of the stuff that you have to clean you need to make certain that your child is not placed near one of the many gigantic anthills! I also just may invest in one of the stupid looking hats with corks dangling from the brim as this keeps the flies out of a persons eyes.

Through perseverance, patience, endurance, tolerance, persistence, fortitude, serenity, prayer, or whatever it was that got us through, we made it about ¾ 's of the way. However, ¾ 's of the way is on the edge of nowhere. Not a wide selection in motel's. Let us suffice to say that the Keith Motor Lodge does not rank in my top 10 places, and the attached sub par "restaurant" was the only place in the whole town to eat. I am thankful that we stopped though. When we pulled Madden out of her seat she was listless, gray, and her lips were blue. After a day of not keeping anything down she was terribly dehydrated. We called the local hospital to get some advice as to what we should do. We were reassured that we were doing the right thing but that if her symptoms persisted that we should bring her in. My understanding of fear has reached a new level.

After a really long night and subsequent long next day...we arrived in the Barossa and our holiday cottage. Madden was still vomiting but a bit pinker in color and we were so relieved to have her out of the car and be in the company of other people.

The cottage that we stayed in was really cool. It was a three bedroom place with walls that were sufficiently thick to isolate the couple without a child from the other two couples with children. Plus we got to go to some fun vineyards and drink some fantastic wine. We even signed up for a session where we could mix a Grenache, Shiraz, and Mourvedre, to our own special blend and bottle it. Part of the great fun of this was that it reminded Beth and me of being back at the U of M in chemistry lab. My blend is called Madden's Two Tooth Vintage, and Beth's is called Casa de Tjopert. In a blind taste test 3 out of 6 people picked mine to be the favorite. I am not sure how to feel about that. Am I proud that I can mix a good wine, or am I disturbed that my taste buds appeal to the masses.

Also in the blind taste test, Beth ranked her bottle to be the worst mix...even going so far as to label it "foul." Most everyone agreed that it was a bad blend. She blames it on almost a year of not drinking and I'll grant her that.

Penfolds is one of the more famous wineries in the Barossa valley. There are a lot of people milling about the tasting room and the occasional oddball is present as well. I was pushing Madden in her pram and as I turned a corner a man was standing there fussing with his belt. Before I know it his pants had fallen to the ground and he stood there fully exposed in the corridor. I am not sure what to think about it, was he exposing himself to me, the sleeping child, or was he just drunk? I am voting for option 3 that seems to be the least offensive of the three. I also object to black bikini underwear on short, portly men…..

Our other friends that we met up with are Tim and Natasha (She was actually named after the character on Bullwinkle. I am trying to get her to say "moose and squirrel" with a Russian accent.) They have a beautiful 2 year old named Celeste. Celeste has taken a liking to Madden and vice versa. Celeste pretended her water bottle was a phone and was heard saying "Hi Mads, hey you goin' Mads, g'day mate." Not only is it really cute that she did that, but a 2 year old Australian girl has given her a nickname that just may stick. Mads.

You would think that everything would now be on our side for the long drive home, but fate has its own agenda. On the morning that we were to leave the cottage, Beth and Madden both began vomiting. I was not about to give up on the thought that we could still take a leisurely route home and see some of the sights since we missed them on the drive out. Wouldn't everyone want to take a ferry out to a place called Kangaroo Island? This is where Beth put her foot down, no to an extra day on the road and a big fat no to a ferry!!!!! I still had dreams of the three of us playing in the sand and walking along the ocean. We didn't make it very far that first night and stayed in another bad motel with a sick mom and baby. I've had better road trips.

The next day, they were still both sick but we agreed to remedy this holiday and stay for the night in a cute little town called Port Fairy. The path from Port Fairy to Melbourne is a famous for scenery. It is called the Great Ocean Road. We have driven it several times and I wasn't too excited about driving it again but it was better than nothing. We checked in to a beautiful cottage and instead of going out to see the town, we bought a pizza and sat on the floor and played with Madden. We were all happy to be tucked in for the night and everyone was feeling better. It was a perfect evening.

The next morning was our day to drive the great ocean road and salvage what we could of the road trip portion of our vacation. But, the next morning - I was ill! I didn’t get the same stomach virus that the two ladies had but it totally wiped me out. Beth was feeling better and so could drive the rest of the way. It was a unanimous decision to skip the Great Ocean Road and take the most direct way home - through the same ugly sunburned landscape we had just driven.

We have wondered why people just plant themselves at resorts for an entire vacation, but now we get it. Road trips with an infant rarely work.

I wouldn't say that this is the worst road trip we have ever had, the car is still in one piece, but we did learn something from it.

Next time we fly.

Return from Hibernation

I apologize for not being attentive to our blog. Sometimes when there is too much to write, I’m unable to get anything down at all. Blame it on being too busy, blame it on the constant influx of new experiences and the lack of time to process it all, or blame in on the hazy time that is maternity leave. Now as things pick up with our return to AU and my return to work, I suddenly feel that urge to write. But where do I even begin? How can I convey what a whirlwind these last few months of new parenthood have been? The first time Eric and I laid eyes upon our little girl, the wonderment of her first coo and her first laugh, the joy of having her meet her grandparents and their joy in meeting her, the weird body changes, the trauma of labor and delivery, the insecurity, and emotional turmoil that goes along with having a baby… really, it’s all just so overwhelming!
Perhaps the best way to do this is just to type away and see where it takes me…

Minnesota
Our time in Minnesota was first and foremost COLD. It was one of the coldest January’s on record and after having missed an entire winter, we realized how intolerant of it we have become. Where was our thick Midwestern blood and our “It’s not that bad” attitude? Instead, Eric and I couldn’t believe the shock of the temperature on our bodies. To add insult to it all, we both suffered episodes of high-fever-absolute-knock-out winter flu that we thankfully didn’t pass on to our daughter.

Poor baby had to be bundled up in a bunny suit and hauled around in a car seat and a pre-heated car. Her entire head was one layer of eczema upon another. She learned to do “the arch” where her entire midsection would try and buck out of her car seat. This was usually accompanied by sputtering protests and eventual screaming.

The lesson learned is that newborns and winter are very confining. To all those who have experienced this for longer than the measly two months that I endured it…you have my complete sympathy. I get it and acknowledge the difficulty of it! For your struggles, I think you should all be allowed to spend the winter in Hawaii.

The good of the trip, was EVERYTHING else. We got to catch up with friends and family and had time for baby to charm the heck out of her grandparents. Christmas with a baby takes on a whole new meaning and I actually cried in church when I heard the story of Jesus’ birth. Yeah, I know, I’ve heard it a thousand times, but it was suddenly so real for me.

Madden’s grandparents all wanted to see her many times and I loved it when they held her and she smiled for them and cooed. Even better still was when she fell asleep in their arms. When my parents and my in-laws opened the door to their homes, their eyes would immediately look towards the car seat draped over Eric’s forearm. It was always an afterthought to hug and kiss us, their adult children. And you know what? We wouldn’t have had it any other way.

We stayed in Red Wing with Eric’s parents for Christmas and two other times but based ourselves mainly at my mom’s in St. Paul. Her place is a 1 ½ bedroom cottage for seniors. We had our fair share of attention having a baby around there. Space was at a premium in my mom’s little home but she was content to have us around and I haven’t spent that much time with her since I was in high school. I loved being in her pleasant company and she was so happy to have her grandbaby in the next room. I’m sure after TWO months of us however, she’s a bit relieved to have her place back to herself.

We anticipated that when we were home, we would go out with friends and shop and see movies… who were we kidding? We were still very much in new parent phase and mainly we just played with our little Madden. She was only seven weeks old when we went home and there was a great deal of growing both mentally and physically during that time. We were exhausted, I was still struggling with nursing, and we were trying to get baby to sleep when we slept. One would think that two whole months would give us a great deal of time, but the baby learning curve took up the majority of that. I managed to take in two movies and feel there should be some sort of reward for that –even if I cried throughout the first movie because of separation anxiety…

This winter brought new joy in simple things. Heck, we were just happy to make it out of the house! It was wonderful to see friends, play dominoes, go up north, have pictures of Madden taken, go to dinners in people’s homes and out, enjoy lazy breakfasts, play oodles of cards, play with friends kids, get lessons in Photoshop, or just meet for a coffee.

Life couldn’t be the crazy kind of cram-as-much-as-you-can-into-a-moment sort of existence that I tend to pursue. It all had to move slower as there were good hours and fussy hours, nap times, necessary nappy changes, and feeding schedules to manage. When I look at those words written out, it all seems so limiting. But strangely, it wasn’t. It was actually a bit freeing. Why is that? Nothing had to be perfect. Ahhh. That was it. It was finally a time where I could be forgiving of myself for not getting things done in an exacting way.

And yes, we enjoyed for the very first time some activities that requires one have a kid in order to participate. Hooray! We have both wanted to go to kid activities for years. These activities included Breakfast with Santa at my high school and attending the Red Balloon book reading for babies and toddlers. Admittedly, I got more out of the book reading than did Madden, but hey, I had a kid and could therefore not be turned away. Just think of all the years of children’s museums, silly little board games, county fairs, and Pixar films ahead of us. Tee Hee.

Australia
When we returned to Melbourne, it was hot. I’m not talking just Mexico-in-winter kind of hot…it was 100 degrees hot. We went from craving pot roast and potatoes to feasting on fruit and any beverage with ice. It actually felt wonderful to be able to open windows, to sit outside, and not to have to wear 5 layers of clothing nor bundle the baby. We went to the pool, took long walks in the evening, and generally enjoyed just being outside.
However, after just one week here, there was suddenly a heat surge to 115 degrees accompanied by gale force winds. Both natural causes as well as arsonists conspired to create one of the worst disasters in Victoria’s history. Over twenty bush fires raged out of control and the loss of human life is astonishing.

The message has always been the same for those living in the country side; you can flee early or stay in your home to defend it against the fire. It has actually been successful in the past and people have been able to save their homes. However, when you put together the terrible heat, dry brush due to a 10 year drought, and the strength of the wind that was present that day, the end result was raging fire tornadoes that destroyed everything in their path. No person defending their home with a garden hose stood a chance.
It was awful, stupid and senseless. The stories that are emerging are dreadful and the news has been running nightly disaster relief efforts and bushfire tragedy stories since that day. It’s impossible to escape.

One of our good friends here works at an agency that does mapping and disaster planning for emergency services. She has had to listen to the 000 (our 911) calls from the people trapped in their cars and home during the fires. When she talks about the tragedy, her reaction is one of anger.

From our vantage point in the city, we were in no danger. The fires that burned out of control for days remained at least a 30 minute drive from the city. However, the city remained smoky and smelling like a campfire. We chose to keep baby and ourselves inside when it was windy because the air quality outside was so bad. The only effect we witnessed was that dusk brought spectacular sunsets of beautiful oranges and reds that bounced off the smoke in the sky.

Beginning to emerge from all the rubble are stories of heroism and unlikely survival. A benefit concert has taken place and donations have been rolling in for the victims of the fires. Hope is infiltrating.

Well, that’s it for the time being. It’s back to work, back to life, and back to this foreign country we have embraced for now. Madden is in daycare a couple days a week, she’s busy growing, and just sprouted her first tooth. Eric is back looking for work and contented being a “manny” three days a week. He’s been attending meetings with the other stay at home mums and having a great time. I’m back to work part time for now and enjoying my days with my little family. My favorite times are when we head to the pool together.

It’s the lazy days of summer and I want them to go on indefinitely. Too bad winter and work will get in the way of our fun.

Parting the Clouds

Six weeks in.
Madden is starting to smile. I am looking forward to Christmas in Minnesota and I'm loving this invention called Maternity leave. My mom came to Australia and left again. It was great to have another set of arms to hold this little girl and jiggle her and settle her through some of that bad period. I would listen as my mom would talk with Madden about the weather, her future, her relatives, and on and on. It was so cute. Madden is a much more contented baby than she was just a few weeks back. She still returns to her feral state from time to time, but overall, life is SO MUCH BETTER.

At the end of my mom's visit, we even managed a three day trip to Tasmania. We took the overnight ferry accross the straight and Madden slept through. Now Eric wants to move to a houseboat!

I realize I never announced the winner of the due date guessing game... Christine Chovan was the closest with a vote that was just one day and one ounce off. Christine's guess was 30th/Girl/8lb, 6oz. An honorable mention goes to Amy Brenengen with a guess of the 30th/Girl/8 pounds 1 oz. Here is a photo of Christine, so that you can all look at her and say, "Congratulations, Good prediction Christine."

It took having a child to finally get around to it, but I did post a bunch of photos online. Pictures of our little girl, our wedding, and some of our travels around Australia can be viewed. The link is http://adventuresofeande.shutterfly.com/ and the password is Madden

(of course).

Wouldn't you like to be on a 14 hour flight seated next to us?

A solid month has gone by and I can't account for anything I've done. I've lived in baby world for the past four weeks. I birthed a baby, slept a little, and occassionally took a shower and fed myself. On the rare day that I decide to go somewhere, I can usually manage to get out the door by 3pm.

If you are one of the folks who has kindly emailed me, or tried to skype call me, I am getting them and I do appreciate it...but I can't seem to get ANYTHING done.























During the first week, I seemed to be able to do things, but for the past three weeks, we have been continually rocking and soothing a very unhappy little girl. Both baby and mom have been very weepy as a result. Finally, after a bit of trial and error, it seems that my child is allergic to whatever I'm eating as well as whatever formula has been given to her.

The diagnostic process has involved oodles of medication, formula, screaming, spitting up, pumping, lots of advice, herbal treatments, worry, frantic parents, lack of sleep, tears, reading of every child help book we can, and many doctors visits. Our sweet little girl can be so peaceful at rest and giggles and coos and squeeks...but when she starts to cramp up and arch, it's a long process to get things right again.
We are still experimenting, but it is SO time consuming. I can't feed her myself but want to keep up any supply I have and so I am pumping all the time. I feel like a cow. In the meantime, she is on this expensive formula that Eric and I refer to as liquid gold. It's the best solution so far until I can get her to stop rejecting me. Such emotion surrounds this!

Now I'm on some crazy diet that makes Weight Watchers seem easy.
The list of "can't have's" include all dairy products, soy, wheat, nuts, fish, and eggs.
If you are asking yourself, "Well, what can you eat." I would just like to say, "Amen to that."

Where is Mississippi Market when you need it?

Tired and Happy

I have so much to say. So so so much! But finding the time to actually sit down and write a long entry is a bit tricky.

I have a notebook that I kept with me at the hospital...it has several phrases and things written in shorthand to jog my memory and help me to compose the blog of all blogs.

Have I written it yet? Ha!
Yesterday I was sitting on the floor playing with Madden when I caught a glimpse of the apartment in the mirror. In view was a stroller strewn with blankets and burp cloths, a couch filled with partially folded laundry, a room filled with bouquets of massive and bizarre Australian flowers, unopened mail galore, and a pile of dishes on the counter.

The whole scene made me laugh.

As I type this now, the setting in our place doesn't look much different. I keep feeling like there are 14 things I need to get to at any given time and but I accomplish none of them. And yet, if my child is fed, clothed, and content, I feel like I've achieved everything.

So...there is so much to say...but it will all have to wait.

I just have to realize that saying a little bit is enough for now.


That...and photos.

Hopefully photos will suffice.


Especially this last one...

Welcome, my dear Eric, to a house of women...

Madden Grace Tjossem

Here she is...finally she has arrived.

We can't be more excited.

I cannot stay and blog long because, I can't stand to be away from my girls.
I wanted to give everyone the essentials.

Date: Oct 1 2008
Time: 11:55 AM
Place: Royal Woman's Hospital, Frances Perry Wing
Weight: 3.84 Kilos (8lbs 7ozs)
Length: 51 cm (20 inches)

Both Mum and Bub are doing well.
I think that they are both doing better than me, I am still in a state of being blissfully overwhelmed.

I promise that we will blog again in a few days, I am on my way back to see the two lovely ladies.

41 weeks

41 Weeks. Really? This wasn’t supposed to happen.

Am I making too nice a home for this kid and he or she doesn’t want to come out?

We were SURE that it would happen this weekend. It hasn’t yet and doesn’t look likely.

Having no plans at all for the weekend was a bit odd for us. Each day we would just wake up and say, “OK, what now?” We managed to go and watch the Footy Grand Finals (like the Superbowl) broadcast on the big outdoor screen at Federation Square in downtown Melbourne. It was a sunny and hot day and I realize that we have suddenly stumbled into summer. No, we’ve been thrown into summer. That means every day I will be wearing the ONE and ONLY pair of summer capris that I own. Beige Capri pants and a purple T shirt is the look of the season apparently.

We’ve eaten out a fair amount this weekend…mainly concentrating on Vietnamese food (my latest craving). I realize that when my stomach growls it sounds like it’s coming from my spine. Where exactly are my stomach and intestines these days?

Today is Sunday and Eric and I wandered down to our favorite breakfast spot along the river. There were kids everywhere and many of them having tantrums. We began to talk about how most of our friends kids were pulling out from the baby and toddler years. We both have nephews and nieces in their 20’s and although some of our friends have babies still (bless your hearts for waiting as long as we did!), many have kids that are growing up now. We watched as they survived and “got through” those years. Eee gads! What were we thinking!

One of my friends who is trying to get pregnant wrote something wonderful about watching a kid in front of her at Kinko’s having a temper tantrum. She wrote, "How could I want something so badly that terrifies me so much?" I get that.

Another friend wrote me a kind email acknowledging that I had heard and witnessed many of the difficulties in raising kids and that no one really seems to talk enough about the joys of parenting.

People do talk about it “being wonderful”, but they leave out the specifics.
Perhaps it’s just easier to talk specifically about the times that are difficult.

Her exact words were this…”And the joy! the miraculousness of it all -- that is way harder to articulate than the challenges”

I needed that…thank you.

*******************

For those that are keeping score and wondering how their bet is coming along…There are officially still 6 of you in the running…

Unfortunately Eliminated...

Eric: 19th/boy/7lb, 4oz.

Hal: 20th/Boy/8lb,4oz.

Anna: 20th/Girl/7 pounds 2 ounce

Pep: 22nd (at 8:42 am your local time)/boy (Leo)/3.58 kilos (7.9lb
Beth: 23rd/Girl/7lb, 8oz.

Lori M: 23rd/Girl/8 lb,1 oz
Brandon: 23rd/Boy/45 pounds 11 ounces (8.5 for real)

Val and Steve: 25th/Boy/7 pounds, 12 ounces

Adam F: 26th/Girl/8lb, 2oz.

Nicolas: 26th/Girl/Weight unknown

Geraldine: 26th/Girl/7lb, 7.5 oz.

Linda G: 26th/boy (Noah or Levi)/7 lbs 8oz

Jenni: 26th/Girl/7lb,9oz.

Ann M: 26th/7lb 10oz./Boy (if girl name is Ann Elizabeth Tjossem after her aunt)

Amy S: 27th/Boy (Jean-Luc)/7lbs, 6 oz.

Laura O’B: 28th/Boy/8 pounds 3 ounces

Kristina: 28th/7 lbs. 8 oz./male

Still in the Running...

Jenn D: 29th/Boy/7lb, 7oz.
Mom Lampert: 29th/Boy or Girl (can’t decide)/7lb, 12oz.

Pete B: 29th/Boy/7.5 lb (born in the Conservatory with a candle stick)

Mark H: 29th/Girl/3.8 kilograms (8.4lb)

Christine: 30th/Girl/8lb, 6oz
Amy B: 30th/Girl/8 pounds 1 oz
Matt B: 30th/Boy/3.57 kilos (7.9 lbs)

Tadpole Diaries #5

September 1

Our German friends had their baby six days ago. Yesterday we went to see them. We went in the afternoon after they were back from shopping for several hours at the mall. When we got to their house, all was in order and they were calm and relaxed looking. Rachel had the baby in one arm and was sipping a cup of tea. They had a 'home birth' with a private midwife present and all went just fine. 9 hours of labor. No problems. They said the kid was easy...sleeping 7 hours a night already. Rachel was back to normal size and wearing her regular jeans. She looked great. The breast feeding was easy. She told me all about the things I would need and wondered why I hadn't gotten a pump yet, and why I didn't have certain things. She was going to take a business trip back to the states with her kid in just 2 1/2 weeks time.

When I was ill and vomiting during the early months of pregnancy, Rachel was out sea kayaking. I'm far bigger than she ever got and so much more uncomfortable. To have her tell me she had a natural, somewhat pain free home birth without problems and subsequent quiet, sleeping through the night baby is just too much.

Enormous feelings of inadequacy welled within me. Was Eric expecting me to be in my regular jeans in 6 days? Should I already have the bottles/breast pump thing figured out. I don't even know how to assemble a bottle. And what do you mean the bottles have different flow rates? ugh.

An hour later, we were back in our car and driving away. I said something to Eric about how great they looked. Eric just sighed and stated that clearly, they had faked the pregnancy and just adopted this child. He assured me that he was pretty sure their situation was unusual. I told him that I just knew I wouldn't be in that much control and would probably need a great deal of support. I think we were both relieved that neither of us expected things to be this easy.
Sigh. Germans.

September 3
Went to the OB this AM. All is fine. The due date remains 24th of September and the baby is ready to go. Head down and dropped even though I can't tell. He says that I am having practice contractions but I can't tell that either. I'm hoping I don't notice the real contractions either.
My BP is a little bit above what is normal for me , but what is normal for me is barely a sign of life, so all is well. It figures that it would be a bit elevated as I worked until 9pm last night doing cases. My ankles were not recognizable by the end of the night. On the way home I called Eric and he began to feel sorry for me. I have a nasty cold, hack all night, pee every hour, have almost no voice, and then get stuck at work until really late. I told him not to be so nice because I was desperately trying to hold it together and if he was too nice, I was likely to get weepy.

Every day I want something different from Eric. Poor man
.
He has strict instructions to be sympathetic without being patronizing. I'm not even sure what that means myself.

September 4
Since Eric has become unemployed, he goes to the gym every day and/or goes for a run. He looks fantastic and I am in the worst shape of my life. Mismatched couple.

Also since he isn't working a regular job, Eric returned to his acting roots and has joined a talent agency in town. He's been appearing as an extra on a couple of really bad Australian TV shows lately and he's been an oil rig worker in a construction commercial. Yesterday when I came home from work, there was a post it note on our kitchen table that read, "2 changes of clothing, Satisfaction, near Southbank, 11:15AM, Brothel."


Ummmm...Did that say brothel?





Apparently that was Eric's next gig. He's an extra is some show called "Satisfaction" and it just happens to be in a brothel.

Can I say that I looked like the most understanding wife on the planet? Here I am at 9 months pregnant, dropping my husband off at a house of ladies.


September 5
As the date gets closer I try to tell myself to get excited, but I just keep getting more and more frightened of the labor and delivery part of things. Too many people have told me too many stories for too many years. And suddenly, I can remember each of these stories in full detail.
Yes, terrified.
People see that I'm pregnant, start telling stories, somewhere along the line say something like, "oh, I shouldn't say this...", and continue on anyway.

I'm quite certain that I won't die. I am certain however, that after 4 days of hard labor I will rip in half and never be the same again.

I'm also scared of something called 'forceps'. I'm frightened that they will do something to my baby, that they will hurt him or her, that they will let it go on to long, that they will leave me in a room and forget about me, that the pain meds won't take, that I will ask for an epidural and become paralyzed by it permanently.

I'm particularly emotional and sensitive about this right now. And I wonder why there has to be pain with childbirth. why why why?

September 6
Other than the fear of what's coming, I'm having a good pregnancy.

When I was sick those first few weeks and getting depressed...well...that was bad. Since that time, I'm larger, but my spirits are really good, I'm mobile, I still take walks, go to the gym, eat what I want...all good.

Sure there are discomforts. Straight back chairs are the enemy. I would like to have the ribs on my right side temporarily removed and getting up 8 times a night to use the toilet leaves me tired and understanding of all my patients that complain of prostrate problems. I also am so tired when I get up that I usually run into doors and end up with a few bruises on the arms. But, generally, I'm good.

When I think about all those people who need to be on bed rest, or those who go into labor really early, or those who lose a baby somewhere along the way, I know I am a very lucky woman.

I have a cold right now...a really bad cold. The kind that makes your nose all red, and ruins your voice for days. I've had it for a week now and I can't take anything for it. I can honestly say that is worse than the discomforts of being pregnant.
Pregnancy isn't so bad. Still scared of the delivery part...but pregnancy is OK.

September 7
Father's Day here - again. We celebrated US Fathers Day but now it's Australian Father's Day. Are we going to keep celebrating both each year? Eric and I walked about a mile to our favorite breakfast spot, had a good meal, nice conversation, and pleasant very slow walk home (it's uphill). Eric read all about his beloved Minnesota Vikings online, did a skype call with a friend of his and then took a long nap while I went to the grocery store and picked up some food and beer for him. That was father’s day #2 celebrated here. Waiting under Eric’s pillow is the Dr. Seuss book “Hop on pop” and a book of Sudoku for when we are in the hospital. He has yet to discover it.

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I have one more week of work before I take leave!!!!! ONE MORE!!!!YEA YEA YEA. The joy this brings me is indescribable.

I have 'nested' at work for two weeks now. My file cabinet is organized and clean for whomever needs to access it. I have completed about a 12 page document outlining the process for getting things done in my accounts when I am away, and my email in box is actually able to be viewed on just one screen. Miracle of miracles.
I have given all my accounts the information that I am leaving and whom they should contact.
My car product stock has been counted and is all present and ready to return to our offices sometime this week. I'm ready.

However, it's now time to get things done at home.

We have the kid stuff we need as Eric has been doing the "nesting" on the home front.
However, there are several things I would like to complete before the baby arrives.
I have one week to do it...so here is my plan:

Monday: Answer about 75 emails in my personal account. Reply with fun, long, and witty responses to all whom have written. Additionally, send all written correspondence via snail mail and purchase creative and worthy gifts for the three friends whom I never got wedding gifts for during the last decade.

Tuesday: Make all doctors appointments for the year, including dentist, dermatologist, general practitioner, pediatrician, scheduled immunizations, etc. After this, take long walk, work out at gym, sit leisurely in cafe while reading paper, stock up at grocery store and then cook gourmet dinner complete with candlelight and music.

Wednesday: Write my first novel. Begin work on screenplay. Learn to use photo shop and print photos for albums, including a wedding book which has yet to be assembled and should probably be done before the baby's album. Take photos of cool and interesting things around Melbourne and post on blog for all to see.

Thursday: Get call from publisher. Contemplate offer while cleaning entire apartment. Cleaning should include washing all carpet and rugs, doing all laundry, washing windows and blinds, organizing all drawers in kitchen and bathroom, organizing bookshelf, organizing files, cleaning out refrigerator shelves, cooking 5-6 meals to be frozen for later consumption, scrubbing kitchen floor and doing gardening on patio.

Friday: Wash, dry, press, fold, and store all maternity work clothing since I won't be needing it anymore. Go through wardrobe and pull out all "possible" clothing that may work for whatever my new shape becomes???
Complete all documentation for Australian taxes since they are due in October.
Prepare all paperwork needed for US consulate offices to obtain baby passport and for Australian consulate for obtaining babies visa.

Saturday
Attend OB appointment in AM, then go to breakfast, spend time with Eric and find cute outfit to attend evening surprise birthday bash in city for friend from work.

Sunday
Collapse on couch and eat ice cream bars all day. Later that evening, have baby.

September 8
Eric and I tried to call our friends Amy and Troy the other day, but they didn't answer so we just left a message. Then...I received this email from Amy...

"Thanks for the phone call. Sorry we missed it! We were having family movie night which is generally loud enough for us not to hear the phone. Last night was Karate Dog with the main character voiced by Chevy Chase. Jon Voigt starred. I think he needed some money. We've already seen all of the Air Bud series. Did you know there are 5?"

I looked up "Karate Dog" on the Rotten Tomatoes Movie Web site and this is the synopsis...

Rated: PG [See Full Rating] Martial Arts Action/Violence and Some Suggestive Content
Runtime: 84 mins
Synopsis: After looking into the death of an elderly man in Chinatown, LAPD computer expert Peter Fowler (Simon Rex) can only find one witness, and it's a dog named Cho Cho. At first this doesn't seem much help, until it is revealed that Cho Cho possesses the power to speak with people. The surprises keep coming, when it turns out that the super dog is also a martial arts master, intent on hunting down his master's killer and making him pay.

Is this what people actually watch with children? I copied her on the review and she sent me an email in return with photos from the movie.

Oh, by the way, besides the original "Air Bud" here are the other titles:

Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch
Air Bud: World Pup
Air Bud: Golden Receiver
Air Bud Spikes Back

That is just plain disturbing.


September 8
For years, I enjoyed taking my dog Tofte to the dog park. This is an activity that can ONLY be enjoyed by dog owners. It would be very boring unless you have one to keep your eye on. I would watch some dogs share with Tofte and it would make me happy. I would watch her get snubbed and I would feel bad. Some dogs were faster, others better mannered, others ill tempered. I loved it when I felt proud of her.

Is this a minor version of what a trip to the playground with kids will become?

September 9
I'm like a kid awaiting summer vacation. Four more days of work until I'm off. The air smells like spring and things are in bloom. C'mon summer! I keep calling it my summer holiday...then I have to correct myself and say, I mean maternity leave. Oops. Quite different, right?

September 10 (night)
2 more days!

September 15
Monday...I'm free from work. free free free.

September 16
Since becoming pregnant I have been craving sweets like a mad woman. I was never much into sweets...I preferred a good dinner and simple dessert. Now all I care about is the dessert portion. I've really tried to keep things in check, but right now I have visions of consuming an entire cake, or eating a pie from the center out. One could describe my incredible cravings as more of a fetish...I like to see cakes and pies in shop windows...I gaze longingly at the pictures on the cake and muffin boxes at the supermarket...if someone tells me they made a dessert, I want to hear all about it. I like to make bakery items as well, I've made about 10 dozen cookies, a pie, and 2 cakes in the last few months. I don't eat them, I give them away. Even that gives me great joy. Just the smell of cookies baking in the oven and watching Eric enjoying them is enough. What is this! Will it continue?
I can't take much more of it.
I've now started the bargaining portion of this craving. Well, if I WALK to the store, then I can get the ice cream bar. If I have the ice cream bar for breakfast, I'm more likely to burn off the calories through the day...

Tonight I really wanted mint chocolate chip ice cream...so I made Eric walk with me to the store. When we got there I decided it would melt on the way home and we should make a different selection. Then we had to do the neighborhood cake shop tour. Three stores. We went to three stores before I finally settled on a piece of flourless chocolate cake. Then, when we brought the thing home, it was all I could do to get through dinner in order to get to the cake. I liked it, didn't love it, and I didn't even eat my 1/2 piece. I think it was more about looking at it in the shop window. Bizarre.

Cursed Sweets Craving!

18 September
One of my co-workers who is on maternity leave gave me a bunch of her preggy clothing. She has no plans to have more children and gave me a pile of clothes with the words, "Take what you want, I don't need anything back, and even though most are summer clothes..you may find some things are useful to you throughout this winter." Yes, most things were for summer but I found a few suit pants and tops to be quite useful and kept them. The other items I gave away to the Thrift store. That was about 2 months ago. And yesterday, I took a bunch more items to the thrift store that I thought I might wear but didn't.
So..what happens today? Yes, I get a call from my colleague who says, "Oh, by the way, hold on to those clothes that I gave you because I have another pregnant friend and she could definitely use the summer items."
I can't lie about this one because it's not like I can "make up" the clothing. I had to tell her I only had about half the clothing anymore. Truth is, I probably only have about 1/5 of the items. But tomorrow I will head to the thrift store and see what items I can buy back. Painful.


20 September
Had an early Saturday morning doctors appointment that lead to me sitting in the care center with fetal monitoring equipment strapped to my belly. I expressed that the baby was moving less these days and so my OB sent me for monitoring just to be on the safe side. It was supposed to take just 30 minutes but we were there over an hour. The nurse kept coming in, looking at the printout, shaking her head and saying, "Oh, we'll let it go a bit longer.." Why do they do that! Everybody walking around and saying things in these soothing voices. It makes me think something is wrong when it isn't. We listened to the fast little heartbeat all that time - loved that as we had only heard the heartbeat once before. What was most interesting is that my "fake" contractions appeared on the monitor at regular intervals of every 10 minutes. Maybe that means something?

Finally, the nurse gave us the OK and we were off for the day. That was it, all was fine. No explanation of the extra time needed for the test...but reassurance that we could go about our weekend. Next appointment is the actual due date. I'm hoping I will see my OB in the labor ward sooner than that.

21 September
There is a strange power in being so close to the due date. Every time I call someone, they answer immediately and assume I am calling because I had the baby. My mother checks her email and the blog daily to see if we have posted anything. Really, Mom, you won't be notified via email. You WILL get a phone call and it will be the very first one I make. I promise!

The support from friends and family and the "checking in" has been GREAT. I love it. Just the number of emails increasing has been terrific. And please, everyone, stick around. Because I will definately need support once the baby is out and I am really confused about what to do.

I called Eric multiple times from the grocery store because I left the list at home by accident. When he noticed that he had missed multiple calls, the breathless phone call I got in return was really cute.

Like I said, I have never known this power.

22 September
Old wives tales for inducing labor include eating tropical fruits, drinking castor oil, taking long walks, having acupuncture, drinking brown sugar water, drinking rose leaf tea, eating chocolate, eating spicey food, going on a bumpy drive, meditating, taking a long warm bath, talking to the baby, and massage.
I have now eaten so much pineapple, I don't want to see another one. I'm avoiding the castor oil method but enjoying the nightly warm baths. I've had a steady diet of spicy food and taken several long walks but there has been no noticeable anything. This child apparently has it's own agenda and cannot be coaxed.

23 September
Not exactly what I envisioned for the morning...Eric and I doubled over the sink retching and calling the poison control center.

Both of us, in a freak accident that would eventually make us laugh, had ingested household bleach.

At some point yesterday Eric had realized that one of our water jugs needed a bit of cleaning and had poured bleach into the container. Later, the woman who comes in to clean our place, noticed the container, filled it with water and set it on the counter. Then, last night, I set the jug in the refrigerator to cool (or marinate as I would later learn).

Normally in the mornings, I sleep in a bit and Eric heads off to the gym. This morning we both slept in and so I got up and made us breakfast. As we sat at the table with our oatmeal, Eric pulled out the water jug and poured two large glasses.

The weird part is, we both took a big gulp of the stuff at the same time. It's not as if one of us could have been the guinea pig and then warned the other one. Nope, it was simultaneous poisoning.

Later, when I got my head out of the sink, I called my OB and on his advice then called poison control.. As he said, "I don't know what to tell you because no one in all my years of practice has ever called me with this question." He seemed more concerned that I not be 'cross' at Eric. I wasn't..hadn't even thought to be angry at Eric...but have now confirmed that my OB is rather protective of the male side of pregnancy.

It turns out that of all the household products we could have consumed, bleach is the least harmful. So, at least we have that going for us. Not that one should go around taste testing household products, mind you.

I still smell bleach, I still taste bleach, I'm still burping bleach, and apparently I will for a few more hours. Yuck!

Eric just called me from work and asked how I was.

Then he coyly stated, "So....what's for breakfast tomorrow?"

I'm sleeping in.


September 24, 2008!!!!!!
Today was supposed to be the day. It is 9:14 PM. I don't think the baby will be here before midnight. Now we know it is taking after me (usually late) more than Eric (always early).

Last night we decided to have a "last night out as a couple without children" and went for a movie. Now, sitting in a movie seat has been uncomfortable for me for quite some time. But there is a solution here and it comes in the form of something called "Gold Class Cinema." The theater has about 30 seats and they are all fully reclining lazy boys! There is a button in the middle consol that you press if you would like a beverage, popcorn, ice cream, mixed drink, or a roasted lamb dinner (seriously!). Let me just say it is heaven in a movie theater. I now don't want to see a movie in any other way. Check it out....

http://www.villagecinemas.com.au/Cinemas/Gold-Class.htm


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We went to the OB this afternoon and after being chastized for being a bit late (again, my fault), he smiled and asked, "So, how are my bleach drinkers?"

We took a look at the baby through his ultrasound and all appears fine and dandy, and cleaner (just kidding). He is encouraging me to wait. ugh. waiting. The pressure in my abdomen is unbelievable at this point. The difference in what I felt at week 37 and now at week 40 is HUGE!!!! When my belly moves now, I feel like it's going to take me with it. At week 37, my belly was heavy, now it feels like the kid is destined to be a 15 pounder. I've taken to calling it "Eric's massive offspring."

The only thing my OB did ask was that I don't deliver on Saturday since he has tickets to the Footy Grand Final. That would be the equivalent of letting one's superbowl tickets go unused. oops.

Now I have this feeling that the baby is destined to come on Saturday.

*************
Eric and I spent the rest of the day wandering about the city, taking fun photographs, and enjoying a long walk on the beach. It was sunny, slightly cool and beautiful. It's strange not knowing if perhaps tonight will be the night, or if we will have yet another week to wander about exploring Melbourne and enjoying 'couples last night without baby.'

I do believe we are both ready for "couples first night with baby!"

Come on kiddo...we want to meet you.

Your votes...

The predictions are in and the following is the comprehensive list...

I personally find it interesting that no one choose to vote for the actual due date (the 24th)! The 26th was definately the most popular of times.

My lovely husband voted for the earliest date, but alas that time has come and gone and I am still GREAT with child.

Some of you chose to give the weight in Kilograms...I appreciate it because it sounds deceptively smaller. Pete B thought this was a game of Clue and added that the child would be born in the conservatory with a candlestick. My mom couldn't choose a gender and added "Either one would be just great, honey". Nicolas wouldn't choose a baby weight without knowing the specifics of my diet. I can confess that my diet consists of a healthy share of ice cream at the moment. Others chose to provide a name, or offer their own name as a tribute (Auntie Ann). And to Amy B...I know that the 30th is also your birthday, but wow, I hope it doesn't go that long!

By the way...it was a relatively even split between male/female: 13 predictions for a boy and 10 predictions for girl.

Eric: 19th/boy/7lb, 4oz.

Hal: 20th/Boy/8lb,4oz.

Anna: 20th/Girl/7 pounds 2 ounces

Pep: 22nd (at 8:42 am your local time)/boy (Leo)/3.58 kilos (7.9lb)

Beth: 23rd/Girl/7lb, 8oz.

Lori M: 23rd/Girl/8 lb,1 oz.

Brandon: 23rd/Boy/45 pounds 11 ounces (8.5 for real)

Val and Steve: 25th/Boy/7 pounds, 12 ounces

Adam F: 26th/Girl/8lb, 2oz.

Nicolas: 26th/Girl/Weight unknown

Geraldine: 26th/Girl/7lb, 7.5 oz.

Linda G: 26th/boy (Noah or Levi)/7 lbs 8oz

Jenni: 26th/Girl/7lb,9oz.

Ann M: 26th/7lb 10oz./Boy (if girl name is Ann Elizabeth Tjossem after her aunt)

Amy S: 27th/Boy (Jean-Luc)/7lbs, 6 oz.

Laura O’B: 28th/Boy/8 pounds 3 ounces

Kristina: 28th/7 lbs. 8 oz./male

Jenn D: 29th/Boy/7lb, 7oz.

Mom Lampert: 29th/Boy or Girl (can’t decide)/7lb, 12oz.

Pete B: 29th/Boy/7.5 lb (born in the Conservatory with a candle stick)

Mark H: 29th/Girl/3.8 kilograms (8.4lb)

Christine: 30th/Girl/8lb, 6oz.

Amy B: 30th/Girl/8 pounds 1 oz

Matt B: 30th/Boy/3.57 kilos (7.9 lbs)